52 jokes about lists
30 penis jokes6 Chuck Norris jokes
is having problems with his Johnson which certainly had seen better times. He consults a doctor
who, after a couple of tests, says, "Sorry, but you've overdone it the last 30 years. Your dick
is burned out; you only have 30 erections
left in your penis
The man walks home (deeply depressed); his wife is already expecting him at the front door and asks him what the doctor said concerning his problem. He tells her what the doc told him. She says, "Oh no, only 30 times! We shouldn't waste that. We should make a list!"
He replies, "Yes, I already made a list on the way home. Sorry, your name isn't on it."
16 rat jokes
The National Institutes of Health
have announced that they will no longer be using rats
for medical experimentation. In their place, they will use attorneys
. They have given three reasons for this decision:
1. There are now more attorneys than there are rats.
2. The medical researchers
don't become as emotionally attached to the attorneys as they did to the rats.
3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things that even rats won't do.
51 hospital jokes
A man is in Hospital
bed wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth. "Nurse
" he mumbles "are my testicles black?"
The nurse raises his gown, holds his cock in one hand and his balls in the other. She takes a close look and says, "There's nothing wrong with them sir."
Man pulls off the oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly: "Thanks for that. It was lovely but listen very very carefully ... Are-my-test-results-back?!"
48 Little Johnny jokesNext page Jokeslist sayings
A third grade teacher
always took role call each morning and had the pupils' answer by reciting a short poem
The first kid
sat in the first row was a teachers pet. He stood and said, "My name is Dan, and when I become a man, I would like to go to Japan if I can, and I think I can."
The next kid was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood up and answered the roll call by stating, "My name is Suzy, and when I become a lady I would like to have a baby
... if I can, and I think I can."
The next on the list was Little Johnny
, a smart guy sitting in the back of the room. He stood up and said, "My name is Johnny, and I don't give a darn about Japan but I would like to help Suzy in her plan if I can ... and I think can!"