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Leg jokes

56 jokes about legs



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How do you teach a blonde maths?

Add a bed, subtract her knickers, divide her legs, enter your square root, leave your solution and hope she doesn't multiply!

25     → Joke


A soldier ran up to a Nun. Out of breath he asked: "Please, may I hide under your skirt I'll explain later."

The nun accepted his request.

A moment later, two Military Police ran up and asked: "Sister have you seen a soldier?"

The nun replied: "He went that way."

After the MP's ran off, the soldier crawled out under her skirt and said, 'I can't thank you enough Sister. I hope you will understand, "I don't want to go to Iraq."

The nun said: "I understand completely".

The soldier added: "I hope I am not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!"

The nun replied: "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of ballsI don't want to go to Iraq either."

54     → Joke


Men are born between the legs of women and spend all their life trying to get back between them. Why?

Theres no place like home ...

37     → Joke


Pete and Mary were walking home from the pub when Mary says: "I need a piss" an goes behind a bush and drops her knickers.

Feeling horny, Pete puts his hand through the bush and feels something dangling between Mary's legs. He says "have you changed sex?"

Mary says "no, I have changed my mind, I am having a shit!"

51     → Joke


I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

With any luck, right after it finishes college.

45     → Joke



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