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Lawyer jokes

65 jokes about lawyers



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What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell?

Another lawyer.

37     → Joke


How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

1) Three. One to prosecute, one to defend, one to screw it the same way they do everything else.
2) How many can you afford?

12     → Joke


Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest Stamps?

They had pictures of lawyers on them and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

14     → Joke


What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.

24     → Joke


What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start! (Unless you are an environmentalist; then you would consider this indiscriminate dumping of hazardous waste.)

14     → Joke


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