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Rank: 742
Lawyers · Judges · Trials
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Trial. A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial, a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."

At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"

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monster2000 /x/star_s2.png/x/star_s2.png/x/star_s2.png/x/star_s2.png/x/star_s2.png1 year ago

The correct way to write the word as you are using it it would be "too", not to. When correcting others always make sure to get the tree trunk out of your own eye first.

Oh yeah, THIS WAS THE SHITE!!!!!! FUNNY!!!!
Chuttles1 year ago

Wow. thats kinda funny but confusing, and "yeah..." you need to learn how to spell
sarah1 year ago

yep to long and umm "yeah..." i think your comment was to long
yeah...1 year ago

still bad and way to long, but to explain i beleive the reason for the second lawyer to be described is so that he seems competent. the woman is obviously telling the trush and what she feels, and he doesn't want the jurry against him, because his own witness is trashing him...
Bob1 year ago

yep, way too long. I dont see why the 2nd lawyer is described.
thomas1 year ago

to long
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