There are four kinds of sex
HOUSE SEX: You and your spouse are newlyweds and you fuck
all over the house.BEDROOM
SEX: You and your spouse have been married for a few years, have settled down, and only fuck in the bedroom.
HALL SEX: You and your spouse have been married for fifteen years and say, "Fuck you!" when you pass in the hall.
COURTROOM SEX: You and your spouse have been married for twenty years, your spouse's lawyer
fucks you out of everything you've got.
What have clouds and men got in common?
When they finally fuck off, it’s a very nice day!
Yo momma is so fat, everytime she farts people think there's an earthquake!
A girlfriend asked: "If my left leg was breakfast and my right leg was lunch what would you prefer"?
Boyfriend says: "Eating between meals!"
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time!
Husband and Wife on 10th anniversary. The wife undresses and says: "What did you think when I stripped 10 years ago?"
He says: "I wanted to fuck your brains out and suck your tits dry".
She says: "What are you thinking now?"
"Looks like I did a pretty good job!"More jokes