Why do men fart
louder than women
Because they have a microphone and two speakers.
Why do men break wind more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
Why are women so bad at mathematics?
Because men keep telling them that this (make gap with thumb and forefinger) is 9 inches.
Any woman that thinks the way to a man's heart is through his stomach is aiming just a little too high.
Why is a man like a snowstorm?
Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll stay.
A woman walks into a shop that sells expensive Persian Rugs. Looking around, she spots the perfect rug, walks over and inspects it. As she bends to feel the texture of the rug she farts loudly.
Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her 'little accident' and hopes a sales person does not pop up right now.
As she turns back, there standing next to her is a salesman. "Good day Ma'am, how may we help you today?"
Very uncomfortably she asks: "How much does this rug cost?"
He answers: "Lady if you farted just touching it, you're gonna shit your pants when you hear what the price is."More jokes