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Joke 2412

bladder · breasts · pregnancy · pregnant



Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?

Yes, your bladder.

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I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

With any luck, right after it finishes college.




What is the most common pregnancy craving?

For men to be the ones who get pregnant.




Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather than briefs?

Yes, but you'll have an even better chance if he doesn't wear anything at all.




A man was walking down the street when he saw a woman with the perfect, and I mean PERFECT, breasts he'd ever seen.

He walked up to her and said, "Ma'am, you have perfect breasts, and I will pay you $100 to bite them." The woman was horrified and began to walk away.

The man caught her and said, "Alright, I'll pay you $1,000 to bite your breasts." Still horrified, the woman began to run away.

The man caught her again and said, "Fine. I'll pay you $10,000 to bite your breasts, and not a penny more." The woman then thinks that $10,000 will be worth it, so she finally agreed.

They went into a deserted alley away from the city action. The woman took off her shirt and bra, revealing the perfect breasts. The man then began to touch, squeeze, fondle, poke, and everything to the woman's breasts EXCEPT biting them.

The woman then said, "Well, are you gonna bite them or not?!"

The man replied, "Nah, too expensive."




Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?

Breasts don't have eyes.








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