How many socialists
does it take to change a light bulb?
One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, fifty to establish the state production quota, two hundred militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously order an American light bulb.
How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb?
1) "The light bulb doesn't need changing, it's the system that needs to change."
2) None. Social workers never change anything.
3) None. They empower it to change itself!
4) None. The light bulb is not burnt out, it's just differently lit.
5) None. They set up a team to write a paper on coping with darkness.
6) Two. One to change the bulb and another to put your kids into care.
7) Five. One to screw it in, three to form the support group, and one to help with placement.→ Joke
How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
1) Three. One to prosecute, one to defend, one to screw it the same way they do everything else.
2) How many can you afford?→ Joke
How many Ukrainians does it take to change a light bulb?
None. In Chernobyl, one just holds the bulb and it glows by itself.→ Joke
How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
1) 1001. One to install the new bulb, plus one thousand lawyers to assert intellectual property rights over every light bulb ever invented.
2) Microsoft doesn't change light bulbs. It declares Darkness (TM) the new standard.→ Joke
How many babysitters does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you joking? They can't even change a dirty diaper!→ JokeMore jokes