54 jokes about hell
48 → Joke
Why did the blonde
cross the road
Forget the road, what the hell was she doing out of the bedroom
42 → Joke
A man goes into a drug store and asks the cashier for some condoms
. The cashier asks, "What size
The man replies, "Size? I didn't know they came in sizes."
"Yes, they do," she says, "What size do you want?"
"Well, gee, I don't know," the man answers.
The lady is used to this, so she tells him to go to the back yard and measure his penis
by sticking it into each of the three holes in the fence
. While the man is back there, the lady sneaks around to the other side of the fence and spreads her legs behind each hole as the man tests it. When they return, the cashier asks, "What will it be? Small, medium, or large?"
The man replies, "To hell with the condoms, give me a hundred feet of that fence back there!"
8 → JokeProposal
stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. He was driving his partner
nuts. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the blasted ball!"
The guy answers, "My wife
is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, man
," said his partner, "you don't stand a snowball
's chance in hell of hitting her from here!"
Why did the cowboy cry during art class? He couldn't draw his gun. ~ Bill Gates O Hell3 → Joke
56 → Joke
Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, "Where in the hell have you been?"
Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo
"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred Dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"
"Well, one, I like to watch my money
grow. Two, once in a while I like to play with my money. Three, I like how money feels in my hand. And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."
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