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Proposal

Jake was dying. His wife Becky was by his bedside.

"Becky", he said in a tired voice, "there's something I must confess."

"Shhh, there's nothing to confess, everything's alright" replied Becky.

"No, I must die in peace ... I shagged your sister, your best friend, her best friend and your mother"

"I know" whispered Becky, "that's why I poisoned you, you fucking bastard!"

7     Short jokes


Little Patrik asked for a bike for his Birthday. His dad said: "We'd get you one but your mortgage is $80,000 and your mum has lost her job."

Next day Patrick walked out with his suitcase packed, his dad asks: "Where you going son?"

Patrick replied: "I walked past your room last night and heard you tell mum you were pulling out, then I heard mum tell you to wait coz she was comintoo, I'm not staying here on me own with an $80,000 mortgage and no fucking bike!"

19     Sex Jokes


One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names?

The dad answers, "Well, son, it's tradition when an Indian baby is born for the father to go outside and name the baby after the first thing he sees ... Why do you ask Two Dogs Fucking."

16     Indian Jokes


Proposal

Little Porny was bored, so she decided to go see what her mother was doing. As she walked into her mother's room, she heard her say: "Shit!" She asked her mother what that meant and her mother said: "Dear, it's just another word for make-up".

So she goes on her way past her brothers room, she hears him say: "Cunt and tits" Sshe goes in and asks: "What does that mean?" He says: "Ooh thats another word for coats and hats."

She goes down-stairs to the kitchen to get a drink and again hears her dad say: "Fuck!" She asks: "Daddy what does that means?" "Aah! my little one, thats another word for stuffing the turkey."

So she comfortably gets her drink and goes to watch a movie. Few minutes later, the door bell rings, she runs to get it opened and says: "Come in, can I take your cunts and tits? Mom is up-stairs putting shit on her face, daddy is down stairs fucking the turkey!"

6     Short jokes


Proposal

"I've got some good news and some bad news" the doctor says.

"What's the bad news?" asks the patient.

"The bad news is that unfortunately you've only got 3 months to live."

The patient is taken back, "What's the good news then Doctor?"

The doctor points over to the secretary at the front desk, "You see that blonde with the big breasts, tight ass and legs that go all the way up to heaven?", the patient shakes his head and the doctor replies, "I'm fucking her."

5     Short jokes






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