is up on stage with U2 doing a gig at Wembley, when the song finishes he starts to slowly clap
his hands and says into the microphone: "Every time I clap my hands a child in Africa dies!"
A voice near the front of the stage shouts to bono in a Irish
accent: "Well stop fucking clapping then!"
I came out of a shop munching on a huge pork
was sitting on the pavement, he looked up at me and said: "I have not eaten for 3 days!"
I said: "I wish i had your willpower