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Feeling jokes

20 jokes about feelings



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If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first?

Who cares?

8     soprano jokes


Pete and Mary were walking home from the pub when Mary says: "I need a piss" an goes behind a bush and drops her knickers.

Feeling horny, Pete puts his hand through the bush and feels something dangling between Mary's legs. He says "have you changed sex?"

Mary says "no, I have changed my mind, I am having a shit!"

50     sex jokes


Proposal

An old man lived alone in Idaho. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Bubba, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Bubba,

I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the lot for me.

Love Dad.

~~~~~~~~~~

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Dad,

For heaven's sake, dad, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the BODIES!

Love Bubba,

~~~~~~~~~~

At 4 the next morning, F. B. I. agents and local police showed up and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Dad,

Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.

Love Bubba.

24     Short jokes


A doctor had just finished a marathon sex session with one of his patients. He was resting afterwards and was feeling a bit guilty because he thought it wasn't really ethical to screw one of his patients.

However, a little voice in his head said Lots of other doctors have sex with their patients, ... so it's not like you're the first ...

This made the doctor feel a little bit better until still another voice in his head said, but then again ... they probably weren't veterinarians ...

40     sex jokes


3 People get stranded on a desert Island - Charles, Matt and Susan. After a while they realise that they are stuck on this island and naturally things happen between the men and the woman.

This goes on for about a year when Susan feeling really bad about having sex with both Matt and Charles and kills herself.

Charles and Matt are sad. But again after a while nature takes its course.

And again about a year later the boys feel really really bad about what they're doing so finally they decide to bury Susan.

37     sex jokes






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