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"Tell me a bedtime story."

"Fuck you."

"That's my favourite."

72     bedtime jokes


What's a bees favourite flower?

A bee-gonias!

0     bee jokes


What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?

When the power goes off.

27     man jokes


What are a woman's four favorite animals?

A mink in the closet, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom, and an ass to pay for it all.

17     animal jokes


Proposal

A lady is throwing a party where each guest shows up as their favorite emotion. A guest arrives dressed in green. "Envy!" she says, and lets him in.

A lady comes dressed in red. She says: "Anger!" and lets her in.

Two naked guys walk up to the front door. One guy is holding a bowl of pudding with his penis stuck in it, and the other guy has his penis in a hollowed-out pear.

"Wait a minute," she says to them. "This is supposed to be an emotion party!"

The first guy says: "Yeah, and I'm fucking dis-custard."

The second guy says: "And I'm deep in dis-pear."

4     Short jokes






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