12 jokes about erections
"
Doctor," the embarrassed
man said, "I have a sexual problem. I can't get it up for my
wife anymore.
"Mr. Thomas, bring her back with you tomorrow and let me see what I can do."
The next day, the worried fellow returned with his wife. "Take off your clothes, Mrs. Thomas," the medic said. "Now turn all the way around. Lie down please. Uh-huh, I see. Okay, you may put your clothes back on."
The doctor took the husband aside. "You're in perfect health," he said. "Your wife didn't give me an erection either."
39
sex jokesA man went into a
pharmacy and asked to talk to a male
pharmacist. The woman he was talking to said that she was the pharmacist and that she and her sister owned the store, so there were no males employed there. She asked if there was something which she could help the gentleman with.
The man said that it was something that he would be much more comfortable discussing with a male pharmacist.
The female pharmacist assured him that she was completely professional and whatever it was that he needed to discuss, he could be confident that she would treat him with the highest level of professionalism.
The man agreed and began by saying, "This is tough for me to discuss, but I have a permanent erection. It causes me a lot of problems and severe embarrassment. So I was wondering what you could give me for it?"
The pharmacist said, "Just a minute, I'll go talk to my sister."
When she returned, she said, "We discussed it at length and the absolute best we can do is, 1/3 ownership in the store, a company car, and $3000 a month living expenses.
26
sex jokesA
man is having problems with his Johnson which certainly had seen better times. He consults a
doctor who, after a couple of tests, says, "Sorry, but you've overdone it the last 30 years. Your
dick is burned out; you only have 30 erections left in your
penis."
The man walks home (deeply depressed); his wife is already expecting him at the front door and asks him what the doctor said concerning his problem. He tells her what the doc told him. She says, "Oh no, only 30 times! We shouldn't waste that. We should make a
list!"
He replies, "Yes, I already made a list on the way home. Sorry, your name isn't on it."
27
penis jokesA
man is lying on the
beach, sun bathing, wearing nothing but a cap over his dick.
An
ugly woman is passing and remarks: "If you were any sort of a gentleman, you would lift your
hat to a lady!"
He replied: "If you were any sort of a lady, the hat would lift itself!"
33
ugly jokesSnow White and the Seven
Dwarfs are roaming in the forest when they come across a lake. The water was enticing and Snow White decides to take a bath. So she tells the Dwarfs to turn around while she is taking a bath in the lake. The Dwarfs protest vehemently because they want to take a bath too.
Snow White relents and says "When I get into the water and you hear the splash, you can turn around." Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into the water, at that very moment, she is startled by a frog who jumps into the water before she can. The moment the Dwarfs hear the SPLASH, they turn around and see Snow White standing
NAKED.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being advertised?
That's easy ... 7 Up!
35
Snow White jokesNext page
Jokes