If your dog
is barking at the back door and your wife
is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The Dog of course ... at least he'll shut up after you let him in!
Two church members were going door to door, and knocked on the door of a woman who was not happy to see them. She told them in no uncertain terms that she did not want to hear their message and slammed the door in their faces. To her surprise, however, the door did not close and, in fact, bounced back open. She tried again, really put her back into it, and slammed the door again with the same result-the door bounced back open.
Convinced these rude young people were sticking their foot in the door, she reared back to give it a slam that would teach them a lesson, when one of them said, "Ma'am, before you do that again, you need to move your cat
What's the difference
between George Michael and a microwave oven?
A microwave stops when you open the door.
comes into a hardware store.
"May I help you ma'am?"
"Yes, please, I need a three inch door hinge."
"Do you wanna screw for it?"
"No thanks," she responds, "but I'll blow you for that clock radio over there."
An airline captain was helping a new blonde
flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning as the pilot
was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her.
She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!"
"You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked. "Why not?"
She replied, "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"