53 jokes about doctors
A veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the usual questions, about symptoms, how long had they been occurring, etc., when she interrupted him: "Hey look, I'm a vet. I don't need to ask my patients these kind of questions: I can tell what's wrong just by looking. Why can't you?"14 → Joke
The doctor nodded, looked her up and down, wrote out a prescription, and handed it to her and said, "There you are. Of course, if that doesn't work, we'll have to have you put down."
"Doctor," the embarrassed man said, "I have a sexual problem. I can't get it up for my wife anymore.44 → Joke
"Mr. Thomas, bring her back with you tomorrow and let me see what I can do."
The next day, the worried fellow returned with his wife. "Take off your clothes, Mrs. Thomas," the medic said. "Now turn all the way around. Lie down please. Uh-huh, I see. Okay, you may put your clothes back on."
The doctor took the husband aside. "You're in perfect health," he said. "Your wife didn't give me an erection either."
4 out of 5 doctors say that if they were stranded on a deserted island with no lawyers, they wouldn't need any aspirin.16 → Joke
An old lady is being examined by a doctor who asks her: "Have you ever been bedridden?"27 → Joke
The old lady smiles and says: "I certainly have and I've been table ended and back skuttled a few times too!"
A doctor had just finished a marathon sex session with one of his patients. He was resting afterwards and was feeling a bit guilty because he thought it wasn't really ethical to screw one of his patients.29 → Joke
However, a little voice in his head said Lots of other doctors have sex with their patients, ... so it's not like you're the first ...
This made the doctor feel a little bit better until still another voice in his head said, but then again ... they probably weren't veterinarians ...
Jokes related to doctor jokesNext page Back to home