Diet jokes

I am on my sea food diet right now!

How does it work?

Whenever I see food I eat it!

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house.

It was delicious.

I came out of a shop munching on a huge pork pie.

A tramp was sitting on the pavement, he looked up at me and said: "I have not eaten for 3 days!"

I said: "I wish i had your willpower!"