Jokes - Deaths
Death Jokes
Deaths 52 Quotes 7 Sayings | Three guys go down to Mexico one night, get drunk and wake up in jail. They find out that they're to be executed for their crimes but none of them can remember what they have done. The first one is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if he has any last words. He says, "I am a priest and I believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on behalf of the innocent." They throw the switch and nothing happens; so they figure God must not want this guy to die, and let him go. The second one is strapped in and gives his last words. "I am an attorney and I believe in the eternal power of Justice to intervene on the part of the innocent." The switch is thrown and again nothing happens. Figuring the law is on this guy's side, they let him go. The last one is strapped in and say's "I'm an electrical engineer, and I'll tell you right now, you'll never electrocute anybody if you don't connect those two wires." God rest his soul. 4 Comments · Single View If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death. 2 Comments · Single View When I was younger I hated going to weddings. It seemed that all of my aunts and the grandmotherly types used to come up to me, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, 'You're next.' They stopped that shit after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals. 13 Comments · Single View Whats the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes: WHACK ... "Damn"! A bad Skydiver goes: "Damn"! ... WHACK. 4 Comments · Single View  Chemist's last words1) And now the tasting test ... 2) And now shake it a bit ... 3) In which glass was my mineral water? 4) Why does that stuff burn with a green flame?!? 5) And now the detonating gas problem. 6) This is a completely safe experimental setup. 7) Now you can take the protection window away ... 8) Where do all those holes in my kettle come from? 9) And now a cigarette ... 5 Comments · Single View |