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Death jokes

39 jokes about deaths


girl,sexy
3 People get stranded on a desert Island - Charles, Matt and Susan. After a while they realise that they are stuck on this island and naturally things happen between the men and the woman.

This goes on for about a year when Susan feeling really bad about having sex with both Matt and Charles and kills herself.

Charles and Matt are sad. But again after a while nature takes its course.

And again about a year later the boys feel really really bad about what they're doing so finally they decide to bury Susan.

20     1


Did you hear that Princess Diana was suffering from PMS?

Pulverized Mercedes Syndrome.

11     12


What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?

A widow.

61     0

businessman:2

car
A passenger taps a taxi drivers on his shoulder. The driver shits himself with shock, swerves nearly hitting a bus and stops inches from a shop window.

"Fuck-me, your jumpy aren't yer, I only tapped your shoulder" says the passenger.

"Sorry," says the cabby, "It's my first day. I've been driving a Hearse for 20 years."

39     2


office gal
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing.

"Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."

As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"

"No!" she shrieked, aghast.

So, he dropped her. As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her.

"Do you screw?" he asked.

"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself. He dropped her, too.

The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor.

"I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.

"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.

6     4




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