Jokes - Dead


 


Deaths · New Jersey · Dead · Hunters
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
8 Comments · Details
Coffins · Violas · Dead · Deaths
What's the difference between a viola and a coffin?

The coffin has the dead person on the inside.
0 Comments · Details


Sex · Wives · Dishes · Men · Women · Dead
woman,rosesHow can you tell if your wife is dead?

The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
3 Comments · Details


Lawyers · Oceans · Environmentalists · Dead
What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start! (Unless you are an environmentalist; then you would consider this indiscriminate dumping of hazardous waste.)
2 Comments · Details
Ethiopians · Yoko Ono · Beatles · Dead
What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common?

They both live off dead Beatles.
12 Comments · Details


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