A little boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where's Mom and dad?" and she replied, "they're up in bed."4 Vaseline Jokes
The little boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "where's Mom and Dad?" and she replied "they're still up in bed."
Again the little boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the little boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma "where's Mom and dad?" and his grandmother replied "they're still up in bed."
The little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "What gives? Every time I tell you they're still up in bed you start to laugh! What is going on here?" The little boy replied, "Well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue."
Mother: "Let me see your report son."1 Report Jokes
Son: "Here it is, Mother, but don't show it to Dad. He's been helping me!"
"Dad, whats the difference between a pussy and a cunt?" a young son asks.67 Pussy JokesProposal
"Look at this," says dad, as he lifts the sheets on his naked sleeping mother, "thats a pussy son."
"It's wonderful dad, can I touch it?"
"No son" says Dad. "If you touch the pussy you'll wake the cunt up!"
One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can't do it because he is her half brother.6 Short jokes
The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off.
She goes to her mom and says: "Mom what have you been doing all your life time? Dad has been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can't marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned out to be my half brothers!"
Her mom replies: "Don't worry darling, you can marry any one of them you want, he isn't really your dad!"
A little girl goes to the barbers with her dad and stands next to the chair eating a muffin while her dad gets a haircut.45 Muffin JokesNext page Jokes
The barber smiles at her and says: "Your gonna get hair on your muffin!"
"I know" she says "im gonna get tits too you dirty old bastard!"