41 jokes about churches
35 priest jokes
The new priest
is nervous about hearing confessions
, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.
The old priest suggests, "Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand." The new priest tries this.
The old priest suggests, "Try saying things like, 'I see, yes, go on', and "I understand. How did you feel about that?" The new priest says those things.
The old priest says, "Now, don't you think that's a little better than slapping your knee and saying 'No shit
?!? What happened next?"
Jesus33 Jesus jokes
came across an adulteress
crouching in a corner with a crowd around her preparing to stone her to death. Jesus stopped them and said, "Let he who is without sin
cast the first stone."
Suddenly a woman at the back of the crowd fired off a stone at the adulteress. At which point Jesus looked over and said, "Mother
! Sometimes you really tick me off!"
10 religion jokes
walks into the Post Office to buy stamps
for her Christmas
"What denomination?" asks the clerk.
"Oh, good heavens! Have we come to this?" said the woman. "Well, give me 50 Baptist and 50 Catholic and one Methodist."
32 God jokes23 nun jokesNext page Jokes
were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic
. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples
. The nun
made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies
. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."