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Change jokes

57 jokes about changes



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How many Amish does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Amish don't believe in light bulbs. God will provide light unto the world.

9     → Joke


How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. Two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.

12     → Joke


Proposal

The Story of an Italian Tourist in America:
So one-a daya I go to America. When I land I’ma very hungry, so I go to a resteranta and order a piece a toast. However, ma waitress, she is very stupid. She bringa me a plate with nothing on it. I says to her,

“I want a piece a toast on da plate.” She’s like,

“Wha?” So I says to her, “

I wanta piece on da plate!” and she tell me

“ You better not piss on da plate you sonsawabich! I angry with her, so I leave. I go to another resteranta hoping my luck will change. When I ama seated, there is no fork on da table. So I says to my waitress,

“ I want a fork-a on da table!” and she says to me,

“You better not fuck me on the table, you sonsawabich!” Again, I leave. I finally get to my hotel, but I notice that my bedsa don’t have any sheets. So I call the manager, and I tell him

“I wanna sheet on the bed!” and he tells me, “You better not shit on da bed you sonsawabich!”

4     → Joke


Many years ago when I was 23, I got married to a widow. This widow had a grown up daughter.

My father fell in love with her, and soon they got married too.

This made my Dad my son-in-law and changed my very life.

My daughter was my mother too because she was my father's wife!

After a few years I bacame father of a baby boy complicating the matter further. My son became the brother-in-law of my father!

5     → Joke


How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

1) 1001. One to install the new bulb, plus one thousand lawyers to assert intellectual property rights over every light bulb ever invented.
2) Microsoft doesn't change light bulbs. It declares Darkness (TM) the new standard.

11     → Joke


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