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A man was rushed in to hospital yesterday because he swallowed a five pound note.

They are keeping him in for observation on his condition - but so far there has been no change!

32    


light bulb
How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

1) A roomful - they have to hold a meeting to discuss all the ramifications of the change.

2) None, they like to keep employees in the dark.

3) "This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile ..."

4) "We've formed a task-force to study the problem of why light bulbs burn out, and to figure out what, exactly, we as supervisors can do to make the bulbs work smarter, not harder."

16    


light bulb
How many bisexuals does it take to change a light bulb?

1) However many turns you on ;)
2) That depends ... is it AC or DC?
3) Three or more ... it's more fun to fumble in the dark that way instead of being alone.

4    


How many Ukrainians does it take to change a light bulb?

None. In Chernobyl, one just holds the bulb and it glows by itself.

12    

light bulb

Politicians are like diapers.

They should be changed frequently ... and for the same reason

35    

uncle sam,tax_payer

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