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Car jokes

165 jokes about cars



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What not to say to the nice policeman:

Hey, you must've been doing about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good Job!

11     → Joke


The vector was walking down cartesian drive when he bumped into a confused Scalar.

The vector asked him what was wrong and he replied, "Help I have no direction."

3     → Joke


Yo Momma is so stupid, she traded in her car for gas money!

10     → Joke


Proposal

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

1     → Joke


A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetary back to the car, the little girl asked: "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"

"Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?"

"The tombstone back there said 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'"

9     → Joke



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