20 jokes about business
What are two reasons why men
their own business?
1) No mind.
2) No business.
and a violist
are standing in the middle of the road. which one do you run over first, and why?
The conductor. Business before pleasure.
A young businessman
had just started his own firm. He rented a beautiful office
and had it furnished with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone
and started to pretend he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"
The man said, "Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines."
Two car salesmen
were sitting at the bar
. One complained to the other, "Boy, business sucks. If I don't sell more cars this month, I'm going to lose my fucking ass
Too late - he noticed a beautiful blonde
, sitting two stools away. Immediately, he offered apologies for his use of bad language.
"That's okay," the blonde replied, "I have a very similar problem ... If I don't sell more ass this month, I'm going to lose my fucking car!"
, who had lost contact for many years, were catching up with each other. One asked, "So, you've got your own company
, huh? How lucky!" The other replied, "Just a small one, nothing to be proud of."
Disbelieving, the first queried, "Small? How many people work
in your company?"
The other sadly answered, "About half of them."