Breast jokes

30 jokes about breasts



A boy sees his penis and wonders what it is. He asks his mom, "Mommy, what is a penis for?" Their mom, not wanting to tell him about sex yet, says "It's for making lemonade honey."

Soon after, he asks his mom "What is a vagina for?" His mom says "It's for making raspberry juice honey."

Later, he asks his mom "What is a breast for?" She says "It's for making milk honey."

The next day the boy's principal comes over. Mom serves him lemonade, raspberry juice and milk. The principal asks them where did they get drinks that delicious. Before the mom could answer, the boy says: "We got lemonade from a penis, raspberry juice from a vagina, and the milk from a breast."

7     → Joke


A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?"

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her 20s, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions."


"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes - dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration."

5     → Joke


Over the past five years, millions of people have spent more money on breast implants and Viagra than was spent on Alzheimer's research.

It is believed that by the year 2030, there will be a large number of people wandering around with perky breasts and erections who will not remember what to do with them!

2     → Joke


"I've got some good news and some bad news" the doctor says.

"What's the bad news?" asks the patient.

"The bad news is that unfortunately you've only got 3 months to live."

The patient is taken back, "What's the good news then Doctor?"

The doctor points over to the secretary at the front desk, "You see that blonde with the big breasts, tight ass and legs that go all the way up to heaven?", the patient shakes his head and the doctor replies, "I'm fucking her."

2     → Joke


Guest: "What's that fly doing in my gravy?"

Waiter: "Looks like breast stroke!"

0     → Joke

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