Blood jokes

25 jokes about blood



Yo momma is so stupid she can't pass a blood test.


Elton John wasn't the only one who composed a song for Diana:

1) Roxette - "Crash! Boom! Bang!"
2) Michael Jackson - "Blood on the dashboard!"



Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man.

"This young man agreed to marry my daughter," said one.

"No! He agreed to marry MY daughter," said the other.

And so they haggled before the King, until he called for silence.

"Bring me my biggest sword," said Solomon, "and I shall hew the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half."

"Sounds good to me," said the first lady.

But the other woman said, "Oh Sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman's daughter marry him."

The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "This man must marry the first lady's daughter," he proclaimed.

"But she was willing to hew him in two!" exclaimed the king's court.

"Indeed," said wise King Solomon. "That shows she is the true mother-in-law!"



Yo momma's so fat her blood type is "Ragu".     ~ I hates Bill Gates



One day a little girl and her brother were taking a shower together and discovered there privates part they didn't know anything about.

Later that day, The girl asked her mom about it and her mom said "Its your garage"

Then the little boy asked his dad said"Its your car'

The next day they were talking about it and the little girl came out the shower covered in blood her mom asked"what the hell happened"And the little girl said"Brother tried to park hes car in my garage so I deflated his back tires"

The Little boy dad saw him crying and he ask why are u crying and the little boy said"I asked sister to open her legs and the i tried to put my car in her garage but my car it wouldn't fit so i went back and front a few times and she moaned and I went faster and faster and she deflated my car now i wont have kids or put my garage in any other girl like you told me about.