73 jokes about blondes
24 → Joke
A blonde girl comes rushing home to her mum and says: "Mummy mummy! Today at school
everyone could only count to 3 but I can count to 5. Look - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Does that mean I am special mummy?"
"Yes dear it does."
The next day the blonde girl comes running in again and says: "Mummy mummy! Today at school everyone could only say the alphabet from A to C but I can go until E. Look - A, B, C, D, E. Does that mean I am special mummy?"
"Yes dear it does."
The next day the blonde girl comes rushing home and says "Mummy mummy! Today at school we were getting changed for physical excercises and all the other girls had really flat chests but I had these ...!" She opens her blouse and reveals a humungous pair of DD breasts
. "Is it because I am special mummy?"
"No dear it's because you are 25."
8 → Joke26 → Joke
A blonde is on a four-engine plane
crossing the Atlantic.
All of a sudden there's a loud bang. The pilot
announces over the intercom “I'm sorry, one of our engines
has just shut off. We'll be delayed 45 minutes.”
Suddenly there's another bang. Once again, the intercom clicks on and the pilot expresses his regret that they'll be delayed two hours.
Shortly thereafter, there is third bang and the pilot announces that they'll be delayed 3 hours.
The blonde turns to the guy sitting beside her and says, “Man, if the fourth engine shuts off we'll be up here all day.”
18 → Joke
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor
came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox
. She opened it then closed and went back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again and went to the mail
box. She opened and shut it again. Angrily, she went back to the house.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her: "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied: "There certainly is! My stupid computer
keeps saying: 'You've got mail!'"
11 → Joke
What's the difference
between a blonde and a light bulb?
The light bulb is smarter
, but the blonde is easier to turn on.