73 jokes about blondes
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.19 → Joke
The first blonde said: "These look like deer tracks."
And the other one said: "No they look like moose tracks."
They argued and argued for a while and they were still arguing when the train hit them.
What's the difference between a blonde and your job?33 → Joke
Your job still sucks after 6 months.
A blonde gets home early from shopping and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. She rushes upstairs to find her husband naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What's up?" she asks.59 → Joke
"I'm having a heart attack," cries the husband.
The blonde rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as she's dialling, her four-year-old son comes up and says, "Mommy! Mommy! Aunt Shirley is hiding in your closet, and she's got no clothes on!"
The blonde slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, right past her husband, and rips open the closet door. Sure enough, there is her sister, totally naked and cowering on the closet floor. "You rotten Bitch", she screams. "My husband's having a heart attack, and you're running around naked scaring the kids!"
What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO?12 → Joke
There have been sightings of UFO's.
4 people in the carriage of a train - an Englishman, a pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and a Frenchman.16 → Joke
It all goes dark when the train goes through a tunnel. In the dark there's the sound of an almighty slap, and when the train emerges from the tunnel the Frenchman is rubbing his face, and there's a huge red mark on his cheek.
The old lady thinks: "I bet that Frenchman fondled the blonde in the dark and she slapped him."
The pretty young blonde thinks: "I bet the Frenchman tried to fondle me in the dark, got the old lady by mistake, and she hit him."
The Frenchman thinks: "I bet that Englishman fondled the blonde in the dark, but the blonde thought it was me and hit me."
The Englishman thinks: "I hope there's another tunnel coming up soon so I can slap that French twat again."
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