17 jokes about bill clinton
27 golf jokes
Did you know that O.J. Simpson, Monica Lewinsky, Ted Kennedy, and President
Bill Clinton are all avid golfers?
O.J.'s a slicer, Monica's a hooker
, Ted Kennedy can't drive over water, and Clinton can't seem to hit the right hole!
19 Clinton jokes
and the Clintons
are flying on Air Force One.Bill
looks at Al, chuckles and says, "You know, I could throw a $10,000 bill out the window right now and make one person very happy."
Al shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, "Well, I could throw ten $1,000 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy".
Hillary tosses her perfectly sprayed hair and says, "Of course, then, I could throw one-hundred $100 bills out the window and make a hundred people very happy."
Chelsea rolls her eyes, looks at all of them and says, "I could throw all of you out the window and make the whole country happy."
34 Little Johnny jokes
Bill Clinton is visiting a school. In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a "tragedy
." One little boy stands up and offers that, "If my best friend who lives next door is playing in the street when a car came by and killed him, that would be a tragedy."
"No," Clinton says, "That would be an ACCIDENT
A girl raises her hand. "If a school bus carrying fifty children drove off a cliff, killing everyone inside ... that would be a tragedy."
"I'm afraid not," explains Clinton. "That is what we would call a GREAT LOSS
The room is silent; none of the other children dare volunteer.
"What?" asks Clinton, "Isn't there anyone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"
Finally Little Johnny
in the back raises his hand. In a timid voice, he says: "If an airplane carrying Bill and Hillary Clinton was blown up by a bomb, *that* would be a tragedy."
"Wonderful!" Clinton beams. "Marvelous! And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?"
"Well," says Johnny, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly would be no great loss!"
11 Hillary Clinton jokesProposal
Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall of clocks
behind him. She asked, "What are all those clocks?"
Saint Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.
"Oh," said Hillary," whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved indicating that she never told a lie."
"Whose clock is that?"
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have only moved twice telling us that Abe only told 2 lies in his entire life."
"Where's Bill's clock?" Hillary asked.
"Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan
What is the difference between Hillary and Bill?1 Short jokesNext page Jokes
Hillary doesn't get caught!