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Jokes > Topics > B > Bill Clinton Jokes

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Restaurants · Chickens · Bill Clinton
Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight's special is chicken almondine and fresh fish.

"The chicken sounds good, I'll have that," Hillary says.
The waiter nods: "And the vegetable?" he asks.
"Oh, HE'll have the fish." Hillary replies.
7 Comments · Details
Hillary Clinton · Bill Clinton · Psychics
skull,swordsHillary Clinton goes to a psychic who tells her: "Prepare yourself for widowhood ... Your husband is about to die a violent death."

Mrs. Clinton takes a deep breath and replies: "Will I be acquitted?"
1 Comment · Details


Bill Clinton · Pope · Virgin Mary · Heaven
President Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, and due to an administrative foul up, Clinton was sent to heaven and the Pope gets sent to hell. The Pope explained the situation to the devil, he checked out all of the paperwork, and the error was acknowledged. The Pope was told, however, that it would take about 24 hours to fix the problem and correct the error. The next day, the Pope was called in and the devil said his good-bye as he went off to heaven. On his way up, he met Clinton who was on his way down, and they stopped to chat.

Pope: "Sorry about the mix up."

President Clinton: "No problem."

Pope: "Well, I'm really excited about going to heaven."

President Clinton: "Why's that? It's not that great."

Pope: "All my life I've wanted to meet the Virgin Mary."

President Clinton: "Sorry, Your Holiness, You're a day late."
4 Comments · Details


Watergate · Bill Clinton · Monica Lewinsky
What's the difference between Watergate and Zippergate?

At least this time, there's no doubt about the identity of "Deep Throat."
2 Comments · Details
Golf · Presidents · Hookers · Sex
dominatrixDid you know that O.J. Simpson, Monica Lewinsky, Ted Kennedy, and President Bill Clinton are all avid golfers?

O.J.'s a slicer, Monica's a hooker, Ted Kennedy can't drive over water, and Clinton can't seem to hit the right hole!
2 Comments · Details

Bill Clinton Jokes
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