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Beer jokes

35 jokes about beer


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What do men and beer bottles have in common?

They are both empty from the neck up!

8    

guys,furniture

What not to say to the nice policeman:

I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

11    

policeman,dog

An Irishman is sitting at the end of a bar. He sees a lamp at the end of the table. He walks down to it and rubs it. Out pops a genie. It says: "I will give you three wishes."

The man thinks awhile. Finally he says: "I want a beer that never is empty."

With that, the genie makes a poof sound and on the bar is a bottle of beer. The Irishman starts drinking it and right before it is gone, it starts to refill. The genie asks about his next two wishes.

The man says: "I want two more of these."

21    


What does a man consider a seven course meal?

A hot dog and a six pack of beer.

10    

man,firecracker

woman,haircut
HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN

Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, wine and dine her, buy gifts for her, listen to her, respect her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her.

HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN

Arrive naked ... with beer.

61    


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