: "What do we call the outer part of a tree
Pupil: "Don't know Miss!"
Teacher: "Bark, silly, bark!"
A guy walks into a bar
Guy: "Hey, barkeeper
, give me a beer
Barkeeper: "Tell you what, if you can make that horse
out there laugh, I will give you a free beer and $500."
So the guy walks outside and whispers to the horse. The horse laughs. The guy walks back in.
Guy: "Where's my $500 and free beer?"
Barkeeper: "Alright, double or nothing says you can't make that horse cry."
The guy walks outside again. The barkeep chuckles to himself as he's cleaning a glass and misses what the guy does, but he hears the horse crying. The guy comes back in.
Guy: "Alright, where's my $1000 and two free beers?"
Barkeeper: "What did you say to make the horse laugh?"
Guy : "I told him I have a bigger penis
Barkeeper: "What did you do to make him cry?"
Guy: "I showed him."
If your dog
is barking at the back door
and your wife
is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog of course ... at least he'll shut up after you let him in!