The 5 worst things about being a penis
1. You have a hole in your head.
2. Your best friend is a cunt.
3. Your next door neighbors are 2 nuts and an asshole.
4. Every time you get excited you throw up.
5. You always are wearing a collar.
Why do men fart
louder than women
Because they have a microphone and two speakers.
was standing in a crowded lift
of the hotel she was staying in. When a man
got in and accidentally elbowed her in the breast
The man said, "I'm sorry! But if your heart is as soft as your tit
, you'll forgive me."
So the woman replies, "If your dick
is as hard as your elbow then I am staying in room 113."
3 guys go camping
in their new tent.
After a night's sleep, the guy sleeping on the left of the tent wakes up in a cold sweat and tells the others "I had the most horrible nightmare that somebody was trying to pull my dick
The guy sleeping on the right says "Weird! I had the exact same dream
The guy sleeping in the middle says "I had a dream that I was skiing ..."
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Why is a man
like a snowstorm?
Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll stay.