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I was recently riding with a friend of mine.

We were coming to a red light, and he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" He tells me this is how his brother drives.

We come to another red light, and again, he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" Again, he tells me this is how his brother drives.

We come to a green light, and he slams on the brakes. My heart nearly goes into my throat. I shouted at him, "Why do you do that?!"

He replied, "You never know, my brother could be coming the other way."

7    


Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?

19    


man,proposing marriage
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!"

The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!"

They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road and dies.

If only men would listen.

34    


What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?

An airbag.

6    

blonde:3

How do you know that the driver driving toward you is a physicist?

He has a red sticker on his bumper, saying: "If this sticker is blue, you are driving too fast."

3    

car

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